The Birth Of A Hummingbird!!
This is truly amazing. Be sure to click on NEXT PAGE at the bottom of each page; there are 5 pages in all. A lady found a hummingbird nest and got pictures all the way from the egg to leaving the nest. Took 24 days from birth to flight. Because you'll probably never in your lifetime see this again, enjoy; and please share. Go to this site: http://community.webtv.net/Velpics/HUM
Monday, April 30, 2007
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Talladega Race !!
Jeff Gordon won from the pole, but someone else should have won. He passed Dale Earnhardt
in number of wins. Placing Earnhardt in 7th all time winners. Richard Petty is the all time leader with 200 wins. No one is even close to him.
Too many cautions again, but that is restrictor plate racing. Dale Jr. just didn't have enough power to move himself to the front in the last laps, but finished 5th today.
Next week, Saturday evening as a matter of fact, they are in Richmond, Va. Jr. won there last year. Hopfully he will again this year.
I've been to Richmond many times but not since the reconfigured the track.
Week after that its to Darlington Raceway which should be a good race.
in number of wins. Placing Earnhardt in 7th all time winners. Richard Petty is the all time leader with 200 wins. No one is even close to him.
Too many cautions again, but that is restrictor plate racing. Dale Jr. just didn't have enough power to move himself to the front in the last laps, but finished 5th today.
Next week, Saturday evening as a matter of fact, they are in Richmond, Va. Jr. won there last year. Hopfully he will again this year.
I've been to Richmond many times but not since the reconfigured the track.
Week after that its to Darlington Raceway which should be a good race.
Friday, April 27, 2007
The Solution.
Everyone concentrates on the problems we're having in this country lately;illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, wild animals attacking humans in Florida.
Not me. I concentrate on solutions to problems. The result is a win-win-win situation:
+ Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border
+ Use the dirt to raise the levees in New Orleans
+ Put the Florida alligators in the moat.
Any other problems you would like for me to solve today
Not me. I concentrate on solutions to problems. The result is a win-win-win situation:
+ Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border
+ Use the dirt to raise the levees in New Orleans
+ Put the Florida alligators in the moat.
Any other problems you would like for me to solve today
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
The Ant And The Grasshopper!!
*OLD VERSION*:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer Away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter,so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself! ************************************************************ *MODERN VERSION:*
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be?, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome."
Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer Away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter,so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself! ************************************************************ *MODERN VERSION:*
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be?, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome."
Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote
Monday, April 23, 2007
Don't Take Me If I Don't Want to Go!
This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
...........After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women--she loved to browse.
One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her localWal-Mart.
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store.
Our complaints against Mr.Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people'scarts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,"Code 3 in Housewares - get on it right away."
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handleing guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his "Madonna look"by using different sizes of funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed "OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!"
And last, but not least,
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"
Regards,
Wal-Mart
...........After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women--she loved to browse.
One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her localWal-Mart.
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store.
Our complaints against Mr.Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people'scarts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,"Code 3 in Housewares - get on it right away."
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handleing guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his "Madonna look"by using different sizes of funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed "OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!"
And last, but not least,
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"
Regards,
Wal-Mart
Friday, April 20, 2007
This Will Open Your Eyes !
AS "THEY" SAY-----ONLY IN AMERICA!!!!By Paul Harvey
Conveniently Forgotten Facts.
Back in 1969 a group of Black Panthers decided that a fellow black panther named Alex Rackley needed to die. Rackley was suspected of disloyalty. Rackley was first tied to a chair.
Once safely immobilized, his friends tortured him for hours by, among other things, pouring boiling water on him.
When they got tired of torturing Rackley, Black Panther member, Warren Kimbro took Rackley outside and put a bullet in his head.
Rackley's body was later found floating in a river about 25 miles north of New Haven, Connecticut.
Perhaps at this point you're curious as to what happened to these Black Panthers?
In 1977, that's only eight years later, only one of the killers was still in jail.
The shooter, Warren Kimbro, managed to get a scholarship to Harvard and became good friends with none other than Al Gore.
He later became an assistant dean at an Eastern Connecticut State College.
Isn't that something? As a '60s radical you can pump a bullet into someone's head and a few years later, in the same state, you can become an assistant college dean! Only in America!Erica Huggins was the woman who served the Panthers by boiling the water forMr. Rackley's torture.
Some years later Ms. Huggins was elected to a California School Board. How in the world do you think these killers got off so easily? Maybe it was in some part due to the efforts of two people who came to the defense of the Panthers. These two people actually went so far as to shut down Yale University with demonstrations in defense of the accused Black Panthers during their trial.
One of these people was none other than Bill Lan Lee. Mr. Lee, or Mr. Lan Lee, as the case may be, isn't a college dean. He isn't a member of a California School Board. He is now head of the United States Justice Department's Civil Rights Division, appointed by none other than Bill Clinton.
O.K., so who was the other Panther defender? Is this other notable Panther defender now a school board member? Is this other Panther apologist now an assistant college dean? No, neither!
The other Panther defender was, like Lee, a radical law student at Yale University at the time.
She is now known as The "smartest woman in the world."
She is none other than the Democratic senator from the State of New York----our former First Lady, the incredible Hillary Rodham Clinton.
And now, as Paul Harvey said; "You know the rest of the story".
Pass this on!
This deserves the widest possible press.
Also remember it, when, she runs for President.
Conveniently Forgotten Facts.
Back in 1969 a group of Black Panthers decided that a fellow black panther named Alex Rackley needed to die. Rackley was suspected of disloyalty. Rackley was first tied to a chair.
Once safely immobilized, his friends tortured him for hours by, among other things, pouring boiling water on him.
When they got tired of torturing Rackley, Black Panther member, Warren Kimbro took Rackley outside and put a bullet in his head.
Rackley's body was later found floating in a river about 25 miles north of New Haven, Connecticut.
Perhaps at this point you're curious as to what happened to these Black Panthers?
In 1977, that's only eight years later, only one of the killers was still in jail.
The shooter, Warren Kimbro, managed to get a scholarship to Harvard and became good friends with none other than Al Gore.
He later became an assistant dean at an Eastern Connecticut State College.
Isn't that something? As a '60s radical you can pump a bullet into someone's head and a few years later, in the same state, you can become an assistant college dean! Only in America!Erica Huggins was the woman who served the Panthers by boiling the water forMr. Rackley's torture.
Some years later Ms. Huggins was elected to a California School Board. How in the world do you think these killers got off so easily? Maybe it was in some part due to the efforts of two people who came to the defense of the Panthers. These two people actually went so far as to shut down Yale University with demonstrations in defense of the accused Black Panthers during their trial.
One of these people was none other than Bill Lan Lee. Mr. Lee, or Mr. Lan Lee, as the case may be, isn't a college dean. He isn't a member of a California School Board. He is now head of the United States Justice Department's Civil Rights Division, appointed by none other than Bill Clinton.
O.K., so who was the other Panther defender? Is this other notable Panther defender now a school board member? Is this other Panther apologist now an assistant college dean? No, neither!
The other Panther defender was, like Lee, a radical law student at Yale University at the time.
She is now known as The "smartest woman in the world."
She is none other than the Democratic senator from the State of New York----our former First Lady, the incredible Hillary Rodham Clinton.
And now, as Paul Harvey said; "You know the rest of the story".
Pass this on!
This deserves the widest possible press.
Also remember it, when, she runs for President.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
My Heart goes out for the Losses at Viginia Tech
I understand a very disturbed young man committed the crime of mass murder at this college, and I feel very bad for the familys and friends of these young people. Life is a journey,
not a destination. The American people feel a heavy heart. God Bless.
not a destination. The American people feel a heavy heart. God Bless.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Try this little game.
The object is to move the Red box out of the way before the Blue touches it or the Red box touches the side.Try It !!!!! http://tinyurl.com/56t9u
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Let's Say I break into your House!!
An older lady wrote the best letter in the Editorials in ages!!
It explains things better than all the baloney you hear on TV
."Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration. Certain people are angry that the US might protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country and, once here, to stay indefinitely.
Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests. Let's say I break into your house. Let's say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say, "I've made all the beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors; I've done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).
According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must add me to your family's insurance plan, educate my kids, and provide other benefits to me and to my family (my husband will do your yard work because he too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking-in part). If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my right to be there. It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I'm just trying to better myself. I'm a hard-working and honest, person, except for ... well, you know. And what a deal it is for me!! I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an anti-housebreaker.
Oh yeah, I want you to learn my language so you can communicate with me".Why can't people see how ridiculous this is?!
Only in America ... if you agree, pass it on (in English). Share it if you see the value of it as a good smile.
If not blow it off along with your future Social Security funds, and a lot of other things.
It explains things better than all the baloney you hear on TV
."Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration. Certain people are angry that the US might protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country and, once here, to stay indefinitely.
Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests. Let's say I break into your house. Let's say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say, "I've made all the beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors; I've done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).
According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must add me to your family's insurance plan, educate my kids, and provide other benefits to me and to my family (my husband will do your yard work because he too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking-in part). If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my right to be there. It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I'm just trying to better myself. I'm a hard-working and honest, person, except for ... well, you know. And what a deal it is for me!! I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an anti-housebreaker.
Oh yeah, I want you to learn my language so you can communicate with me".Why can't people see how ridiculous this is?!
Only in America ... if you agree, pass it on (in English). Share it if you see the value of it as a good smile.
If not blow it off along with your future Social Security funds, and a lot of other things.
Monday, April 09, 2007
You know you're a redneck
Redneck Overalls, Just ask for the 'NASCAR CUT' Yes, the new one is out! The brand new edition of You know you're a redneck when...
1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3 . Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.
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1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3 . Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.
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Flags
*I watched the flag pass by one day, It fluttered in the breeze.
A young Marine saluted it, And then he stood at ease..
I looked at him in uniform So young, so tall, so proud,
With hair cut square and eyes alert He'd stand out in any crowd.
I thought how many men like him Had fallen through the years.
How many died on foreign soil
How many mothers' tears?
How many pilots' planes shot down? How many died at sea How many foxholes were soldiers' graves?
No, freedom isn't free. I heard the sound of Taps one night,When everything was still,I listened to the bugler play And felt a sudden chill.
I wondered just how many times That Taps had meant "Amen,
"When a flag had draped a coffin. Of a brother or a friend
.I thought of all the children, Of the mothers and the wives,
Of fathers, sons and husbands With interrupted lives.
I thought about a graveyard At the bottom of the sea
Of unmarked graves in Arlington.No, freedom isn't free.
Enjoy Your Freedom & God Bless Our Troops
Show Your Support Send This Page Along Today
A young Marine saluted it, And then he stood at ease..
I looked at him in uniform So young, so tall, so proud,
With hair cut square and eyes alert He'd stand out in any crowd.
I thought how many men like him Had fallen through the years.
How many died on foreign soil
How many mothers' tears?
How many pilots' planes shot down? How many died at sea How many foxholes were soldiers' graves?
No, freedom isn't free. I heard the sound of Taps one night,When everything was still,I listened to the bugler play And felt a sudden chill.
I wondered just how many times That Taps had meant "Amen,
"When a flag had draped a coffin. Of a brother or a friend
.I thought of all the children, Of the mothers and the wives,
Of fathers, sons and husbands With interrupted lives.
I thought about a graveyard At the bottom of the sea
Of unmarked graves in Arlington.No, freedom isn't free.
Enjoy Your Freedom & God Bless Our Troops
Show Your Support Send This Page Along Today
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Tips For Handling Telemarketers.
Three Little Words That Work !!
(1)The three little words are: "Hold On, Please..." Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off (instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt !!!!
Then when you eventually hear the phone company's "beep-beep-beep" tone,you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task. These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting.
(2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?
This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone. This technique is used to determine the best time of day for a "real"sales person to call back and get someone at home.
What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times, as quickly as possible This confuses the machine that dialed the call and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer !!!
(3) Junk Mail Help: When you get "ads" enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these"ads" with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away. When you get those "pre-approved" letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away there turn envelope. Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 39 cents postage "IF" and when they receive them back. It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 50 cents before the last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-paid return envelopes.
One of Andy Rooney's (60 minutes) ideas. Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back! If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them. You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to, just to keep them guessing! It still costs them 39 cents. The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it...Twice! Let's help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mailis cutting into their business profits, and that's why they need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea ! If enough people follow these tips, it will work THIS JUST MIGHT BE ONE E-MAIL THAT YOU WILL WANT TO SHARE WITH YOUR FRIENDS
(1)The three little words are: "Hold On, Please..." Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off (instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt !!!!
Then when you eventually hear the phone company's "beep-beep-beep" tone,you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task. These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting.
(2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?
This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone. This technique is used to determine the best time of day for a "real"sales person to call back and get someone at home.
What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times, as quickly as possible This confuses the machine that dialed the call and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer !!!
(3) Junk Mail Help: When you get "ads" enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these"ads" with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away. When you get those "pre-approved" letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away there turn envelope. Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 39 cents postage "IF" and when they receive them back. It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 50 cents before the last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-paid return envelopes.
One of Andy Rooney's (60 minutes) ideas. Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back! If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them. You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to, just to keep them guessing! It still costs them 39 cents. The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it...Twice! Let's help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mailis cutting into their business profits, and that's why they need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea ! If enough people follow these tips, it will work THIS JUST MIGHT BE ONE E-MAIL THAT YOU WILL WANT TO SHARE WITH YOUR FRIENDS
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Taxes,Taxes,Taxes
At first I thought this was funny...then I realized the awful truth of it.
Be sure to read all the way to the end!
Tax his land,Tax his bed,Tax the table At which he's fed.
Tax his tractor,Tax his mule,Teach him taxes Are the rule.
Tax his cow,Tax his goat,Tax his pants,Tax his coat.
Tax his ties,Tax his shirt,Tax his work,Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco,Tax his drink,Tax him if he Tries to think.
Tax his cigars,Tax his beers, If he cries, then Tax his tears.
Tax all he has Then let him know That you won't be done Till he has no dough.
When he screams and hollers,Then tax him some more,Tax him till He's good and sore.
Then tax his coffin,Tax his grave,Tax the sod in Which he's laid.
Put these words upon his tomb,"Taxes drove me to my doom..."When he's gone, Do not relax,Its time to apply The inheritance tax.
Accounts Receivable Tax, Building Permit Tax, CDL license Tax, Cigarette Tax Corporate Income Tax, Dog License Tax ,Federal Income Tax, Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)Fishing License Tax, Food License Tax,Fuel permit tax, Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)Hunting License Tax, Inheritance Tax, Interest expense Inventory tax, IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax, Luxury Taxes, Marriage License Tax, Medicare Tax ,Property Tax ,Real Estate Tax ,Service charge taxes, Social Security Tax, Road usage taxes ,Sales Tax,
Recreational Vehicle Tax, School Tax ,State Income Tax, State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax ,Telephone federal universal service fee tax ,Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes, Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax,
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax ,Telephone state and local tax, Telephone usage charge tax, Utility Taxes ,Vehicle License Registration Tax,
Vehicle Sales Tax, Watercraft registration Tax,Well Permit Tax, Workers Compensation Tax.
COMMENTS: Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago,and our nation was the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.
What happened? I'll tell you what happened. We started taking care of everyone else,and forgot our own. And I still have to "press 1" for English I hope this goes around world 10 times
Be sure to read all the way to the end!
Tax his land,Tax his bed,Tax the table At which he's fed.
Tax his tractor,Tax his mule,Teach him taxes Are the rule.
Tax his cow,Tax his goat,Tax his pants,Tax his coat.
Tax his ties,Tax his shirt,Tax his work,Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco,Tax his drink,Tax him if he Tries to think.
Tax his cigars,Tax his beers, If he cries, then Tax his tears.
Tax all he has Then let him know That you won't be done Till he has no dough.
When he screams and hollers,Then tax him some more,Tax him till He's good and sore.
Then tax his coffin,Tax his grave,Tax the sod in Which he's laid.
Put these words upon his tomb,"Taxes drove me to my doom..."When he's gone, Do not relax,Its time to apply The inheritance tax.
Accounts Receivable Tax, Building Permit Tax, CDL license Tax, Cigarette Tax Corporate Income Tax, Dog License Tax ,Federal Income Tax, Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)Fishing License Tax, Food License Tax,Fuel permit tax, Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)Hunting License Tax, Inheritance Tax, Interest expense Inventory tax, IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax, Luxury Taxes, Marriage License Tax, Medicare Tax ,Property Tax ,Real Estate Tax ,Service charge taxes, Social Security Tax, Road usage taxes ,Sales Tax,
Recreational Vehicle Tax, School Tax ,State Income Tax, State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax ,Telephone federal universal service fee tax ,Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes, Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax,
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax ,Telephone state and local tax, Telephone usage charge tax, Utility Taxes ,Vehicle License Registration Tax,
Vehicle Sales Tax, Watercraft registration Tax,Well Permit Tax, Workers Compensation Tax.
COMMENTS: Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago,and our nation was the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.
What happened? I'll tell you what happened. We started taking care of everyone else,and forgot our own. And I still have to "press 1" for English I hope this goes around world 10 times
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
The Love Dress.
A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son's house . She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room. "What are you doing?" she asked. "I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work, " the daughter-in-law answered. "But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed. "This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained. "Love dress? But you're naked!" "My husband loves me to wear this dress, " she explained. "When he sees it, he instantly becomes romantic. The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered and put on her best perfume, dimmed the li ghts, put on a romantic CD, and laid on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively. "What are you doing?" he asked. "This is my love dress, " she whispered, sensually. "Needs ironing, " he said. "What's for dinner?" His funeral will be held this coming Thursday, closed casket.
Monday, April 02, 2007
Charlie Daniels Speaks
STAND UP WITH CHARLIE
HATS OFF TO CHARLIE DANIELS....AT LEAST HE HAS THE COURAGE TO SPEAK HIS MIND!!!
I don't know how everybody else feels about it, but to me I think Hispanic people in this country, legally or illegally, made a huge public relations mistake with their recent demonstrations.
I don't blame anybody in the world for wanting to come to
the United States of America, as it is a truly wonderful place.
But when the first thing you do when you set foot on American soil is illegal it is flat out wrong and I don't care how many lala land left heads come out of the woodwork and start trying to give me sensitivity lessons.
I don't need sensitivity lessons, in fact I don't have any-thing against Mexicans! I just have something against criminals and anybody who comes into this country illegally is a criminal and if you don't believe it try coming into America from a foreign country without a passport and see how far you get. What disturbs me about the demonstrations is that it's tanta-mount to saying, "I am going to come into your country even if it means breaking your laws and there's nothing you can do about it."
It's an "in your face" action and speaking just for me, I don't like it one little bit and if there were a half dozen pairs of gonads in Washington bigger than English peas it wouldn't be happening.
Where are you, you bunch of lily livered, pantywaist, forked tongued, sorry excuses for defenders of The Constitution? Have you been drinking the water out of the Potomac again?
And even if you pass a bill on immigration it will probably be so pork laden and watered down that it won't mean anything anyway. Besides, what good is another law going to do when you won't enforce the ones on the books now?
And what ever happened to the polls, guys? I thought you folks were the quintessential finger wetters. Well you sure ain't paying any attention to the polls this time because somewhere around eighty percent of Americans want some thing done about this mess, and mess it is and getting bigger everyday.
This is no longer a problem, it is a dilemma and headed for being a tragedy. Do you honestly think that what happened in France with the Muslims can't happen here when thebusinesses who hire these people finally run out of jobs and a few million disillusioned Hispanics take to the streets?
If you, Mr. President, Congressmen and Senators, knuckle under on this and refuse to do something meaningful it means that you care nothing for the kind of country your children and grand-children will inherit.
But I guess that doesn't matter as long as you get re-elected.
Shame on you.
One of the big problems in America today is that if you have the nerve to say anything derogatory about any group of people (except Christians) you are going to be screamed at by the media and called a racist, a bigot and anything else they can think of to call you
Well I've been pounded by the media before and I'm still rockin' and rollin' and when it comes to speaking the truth I fear not. And the truth is that the gutless, gonadless, milksop politicians are just about to sell out the United States of America because they don't have the intestinal fortitude to stand up to face reality.
And reality is that we would never allow any other group of people to have 12 million illegal in this country and turn around and say, "Oh it's ok, ya'll can stay here if you'll just allow us to slap your wrist."
And I know that some of you who read this column are saying "Well what's wrong with that?" I'll tell you what's wrong with it. These people could be from Mars as far as we know. We don't know who they are, where they are or what they're up to and the way the Congress is going we're not going to.
Does this make sense? Labor force you say? We already subsidize corporate agriculture as it is, must we subsidize their labor as well? If these people were from Haiti would we be so fast to turn a blind eye to them or if they were from Somalia or Afghanistan ? I think not.
All the media shows us are pictures of hard working Hispanics who have crossed the border just to try to better their life.
They don't show you pictures of the Feds rounding up members of MS 13, the violent gang who came across the same way the decent folks did. They don't tell you about the living conditions of the Mexican illegal some fat cat hired to pick his crop.
I want to make two predictions.
No. 1: This situation is going to grow and fester until it erupts in violence on our streets while the wimps in Washington drag their toes in the dirt and try to figure how many tons of political hay they can make to the acre.
No 2: Somebody is going to cross that border with some kind of weapon of mass destruction and set it off in a major American city after which there will be a backlash such as this country has never experienced and the Capitol building in Washington will probably tilt as Congressmen and Senators rush to the other side of the issue.
I don't know about you but I would love to see just one major politician stand up and say, "I don't care who I make mad and I don't care how many votes I lose, this is a desperate situation and I'm going to lead the fight to get it straightened out." I don't blame anybody for wanting to come to America , but if you don't respect our immigration laws why should you respect any others? And by the way, this is America and our flag has stars and stripes Please get that other one out of my face.
Charlie Daniels
HATS OFF TO CHARLIE DANIELS....AT LEAST HE HAS THE COURAGE TO SPEAK HIS MIND!!!
I don't know how everybody else feels about it, but to me I think Hispanic people in this country, legally or illegally, made a huge public relations mistake with their recent demonstrations.
I don't blame anybody in the world for wanting to come to
the United States of America, as it is a truly wonderful place.
But when the first thing you do when you set foot on American soil is illegal it is flat out wrong and I don't care how many lala land left heads come out of the woodwork and start trying to give me sensitivity lessons.
I don't need sensitivity lessons, in fact I don't have any-thing against Mexicans! I just have something against criminals and anybody who comes into this country illegally is a criminal and if you don't believe it try coming into America from a foreign country without a passport and see how far you get. What disturbs me about the demonstrations is that it's tanta-mount to saying, "I am going to come into your country even if it means breaking your laws and there's nothing you can do about it."
It's an "in your face" action and speaking just for me, I don't like it one little bit and if there were a half dozen pairs of gonads in Washington bigger than English peas it wouldn't be happening.
Where are you, you bunch of lily livered, pantywaist, forked tongued, sorry excuses for defenders of The Constitution? Have you been drinking the water out of the Potomac again?
And even if you pass a bill on immigration it will probably be so pork laden and watered down that it won't mean anything anyway. Besides, what good is another law going to do when you won't enforce the ones on the books now?
And what ever happened to the polls, guys? I thought you folks were the quintessential finger wetters. Well you sure ain't paying any attention to the polls this time because somewhere around eighty percent of Americans want some thing done about this mess, and mess it is and getting bigger everyday.
This is no longer a problem, it is a dilemma and headed for being a tragedy. Do you honestly think that what happened in France with the Muslims can't happen here when thebusinesses who hire these people finally run out of jobs and a few million disillusioned Hispanics take to the streets?
If you, Mr. President, Congressmen and Senators, knuckle under on this and refuse to do something meaningful it means that you care nothing for the kind of country your children and grand-children will inherit.
But I guess that doesn't matter as long as you get re-elected.
Shame on you.
One of the big problems in America today is that if you have the nerve to say anything derogatory about any group of people (except Christians) you are going to be screamed at by the media and called a racist, a bigot and anything else they can think of to call you
Well I've been pounded by the media before and I'm still rockin' and rollin' and when it comes to speaking the truth I fear not. And the truth is that the gutless, gonadless, milksop politicians are just about to sell out the United States of America because they don't have the intestinal fortitude to stand up to face reality.
And reality is that we would never allow any other group of people to have 12 million illegal in this country and turn around and say, "Oh it's ok, ya'll can stay here if you'll just allow us to slap your wrist."
And I know that some of you who read this column are saying "Well what's wrong with that?" I'll tell you what's wrong with it. These people could be from Mars as far as we know. We don't know who they are, where they are or what they're up to and the way the Congress is going we're not going to.
Does this make sense? Labor force you say? We already subsidize corporate agriculture as it is, must we subsidize their labor as well? If these people were from Haiti would we be so fast to turn a blind eye to them or if they were from Somalia or Afghanistan ? I think not.
All the media shows us are pictures of hard working Hispanics who have crossed the border just to try to better their life.
They don't show you pictures of the Feds rounding up members of MS 13, the violent gang who came across the same way the decent folks did. They don't tell you about the living conditions of the Mexican illegal some fat cat hired to pick his crop.
I want to make two predictions.
No. 1: This situation is going to grow and fester until it erupts in violence on our streets while the wimps in Washington drag their toes in the dirt and try to figure how many tons of political hay they can make to the acre.
No 2: Somebody is going to cross that border with some kind of weapon of mass destruction and set it off in a major American city after which there will be a backlash such as this country has never experienced and the Capitol building in Washington will probably tilt as Congressmen and Senators rush to the other side of the issue.
I don't know about you but I would love to see just one major politician stand up and say, "I don't care who I make mad and I don't care how many votes I lose, this is a desperate situation and I'm going to lead the fight to get it straightened out." I don't blame anybody for wanting to come to America , but if you don't respect our immigration laws why should you respect any others? And by the way, this is America and our flag has stars and stripes Please get that other one out of my face.
Charlie Daniels
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